Tell me where our time went

And if it was time well spent.

I'm holding up a lot better than I thought I would. I mean, I am completely shattered by all of this, but I am okay. I think its because this is so different. I mean, its not just about me being heartbroken, its about him being happy. She really makes him happy, and thats all that matters. I know I'd rather be with him, but if he's happier with her, than I'd be selfish to keep him from that. I care about him more than I have ever cared about anyone, and maybe that's why this is so different. I set myself up to get hurt, and I have no one to blame but myself. But then I think of the amazing things we could have. And it just hurts so much. We could have been so fucking happy, but he turned his back on this.

If you're reading this, I love you. I have loved you longer than you'll know, and I will never stop loving you, honey. You mean everything to me, and I will wait for you as long as I have to. I never wanted to be just another girl in line, but if thats what you need, you've got it. You made me feel things I've never felt again, and I'm scared that I'll never find someone who makes me feel like you do. You will never leave my heart. And that's a promise.